The Strangest Being Hit On Experience of My Life.

Now I've been hit on by a lot of guys, and for some reason most of them are either really creepy or really crazy so I don't take the "Strangest Experience" lightly.

For example there was the old man in Boston who sang what he wanted to do me as he walked by me across the street from the Fleet Center and then an hour later was sitting across the isle of my train leaning over and grinning at me. And then when we moved twice and he followed, I told a train conductor and it turns out that guy didn't even have any idea where that train was going. This is just an example to show how strange this can get.

So last night I head out to Sarah's party. I only make it as far as the Second Cup three blocks after my apartment when this 30 something bald guy with an accent I couldn't place runs across the street yelling "Wait! Wait!" I ignored him but unfortunately I was trying to cross Parc and I had a red light so I was stuck. So this guy runs up to me and we have the following exchange.

Guy: "Miss. Do you live around here?"
Me: "Uh, yeah, I guess."
Guy: "Oh good. You can help me out then."
Me: (relieved thinking he just wanted directions or something) "Okay,"
Guy: "How do I get to St. Laurent.....to buy you a drink."
Me: "You can't actually. Besides I'm about an hour late for a party."
Guy: "But you're friends are boring. I'm an interesting guy. Seriously who would you rather be with me or your friends?"
Me: "Uh...my friends."
Guy: (throw his hand over his heart) "And I thought you were such a nice girl! When I saw you walking there alone I thought to myself now there's a nice girl I need to get to know her!"
Me: (turning to stare at the light that I had turned green and red again keeping me trapped) "Oh well. Sometimes people are wrong."
Guy: "Ok I'll tell you what. I feel bad just letting this opportunity pass you by. Tomorrow night. We'll go get a drink."
Me: "I have a boyfriend. So no. And even if I didn't, still no."
Guy: "No you don't you're making that up."
Me: "Yeah I do see!" (hold out left hand and points to ring with little hearts in it).
Guy: "Hey! I'm just looking to be friends. You're looking for friends aren't you?"
Me: "Actually, no, I'm not. I'm pretty content with that one."
Guy: "Can I get your number?"
Me: "No. You can't."
Guy: "I thought you said you were looking for friends?!"
Me: "No, I said that I WASN'T looking for friends."
Guy: "Okay, I'll tell you what. We'll just have coffee. Tomorrow at ten p.m. I am going to be inside that Second Cup. I live right there (referencing a building next to second cup), so tomorrow night at ten I'll come done and wait for you. Will you be there?"
Me: "No, probably not. And if I am its a coincidence."
Guy: "You're going to let me just SIT there? I'm a busy man you know. My time is valueable. I make a lot of money."
Me: "What does that have to do with anything?"
Guy: "Oh it has to do with everything."
Me: "Uh-huh."
Guy: "Okay. You know what? Let's just start over. (reaches out hand) I'm Jacob."
Me: (doesn't take his hand instead notices that the light is about to turn green) "I'm Lauren and I'm leaving now."
Guy: "Promise you'll be there tomorrow?"
Me: (walking away and yelling back) "NO!"
Guy: "Emily! Emily wait! Come on Emily don't be such a bitch!"

So not only was this guy either extremely desperate or an extreme egomaniac as noted by his constantly hopeful albeit decreasing in intensity offers. But what really gets me is, oh I don't know, maybe the idea that I have that if you are really trying to pick someone up remembering their name for fifteen seconds usually helps.